Long Long time ago...
woa~~ it's been a long time since i last updated my post.. holidays are already here, into it's second week.. seriously i dunno how i manage to pass by last 2 weeks of my holidays. there are so many programs on the list, but somehow kind of lazy to execute them..
you know sometimes the best time to spend your time, is either give yourself space to enjoy the things u like to do, or spending the so precious time with your loved ones and friends.. to some extent i prefer to do the latter coz i know i wouldn't be doing anything fruitful if i were to spend time alone, think i would just waste my time down there, looking at the second hand ticking by.. :P
i wonder how you guys grade friends? i mean to some extent there would be a certain criteria which u would base on to see if the friend is worthy, and from there choose if you want to develop the friendship further, into best of friends or having a nice relationship with the one you like or love.. for people like me of which such criterias 'fluctuate', i dunno~~ lol..
mostly it's based on first impressions though.. if the first impression of the person is good, of course you would want to continue making friends with the person, if not it's because you are shy or the knowledge of the person is not deep enough..
in any case for me, i dun think i even have the right to choose the friends i want to make, although it's true that everyone has choices even in difficult situations, which it's up to you if you want to take the choice up. alot of times ever since i know the presence of friends around me, i start to think why is it that i would make them angry with me, or for some unknon reason they would leave me.. of course friends do leave us, but for a reason which may be linked to their dislike for you? *shrugs* for example, starting i may be very close to a friend whom i just started knowing, and alot of things in common in fact. but after a while we would drift apart, and when i try to approach the person, it's usually the cold shoulders and you woud feel you had lose this friend, but of what reason? sometimes i do get feedback that it's mainly because of what i do or what i'm like, but the details weren't details at all.. i still dunno why i get such things. yah sometimes i know my attitude really sux, same for anything related to me, but that's only sometimes. one good example would be within ncc itself. even among clts i would get the cold shoulders, especially among my own peers. starting out after the course we just get together, and go through camps together. but just a few months before, i start to feel that i'm kind of left out from the guys.. not saying that i deserve to be in the group but it's just i dunno why that would happen? having close friends for starters, and distant friends or strangers after 'centuries'.. so sick of it and i forsee it happening again. oh well, it always happen to me, partly my fault also.. so tired now.. come to think of it, maybe i'm fated to have temporary friends only and not lifelong friends. just the same for the past relationships i had. nothing stays forever, although you try hard to prevent them from happening..
oh well, that's all for now.. recently been indulging in anime to pass my time, of which 80% of the time is spent on downloading them.. haha.. till the next update.. toodles!! :p
2 Corinthians 1:3-4:
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.
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